alice fell into rabbit hole

back here to have a look

2005-10-05T11:32:00.000+08:00

wandering around and suddenly remembered the old place... turned my back to look at time past... this is where i used to be.

I am Moving!!!

2005-05-01T00:43:00.000+08:00

1. Literally. i m moving house in about 13hrs time. almost finished packing now and sweating like a pig... i hate packing!!! ahhhhhhhh!!!

2. this blog is moving. i m flying back to Beijing on 3rd May and blogger blogs cannot be viewed in China. dun like the feeling of being able to post but never see what i've posted... so i m moving to msn space, tentatively until i m back in Singapore again. it's here: http://spaces.msn.com/members/aliceinrabbithole/

bye bye nus... 4yrs is a long time...

mid packing

2005-04-30T14:21:00.000+08:00

stayed up till 3+ to pack. and woke up at 1130 for more packing. this is how my room looks like now:

earthly possessions... that's what held us down... haha... but impossible not to have coz i m a mere mortal... i need two big boxes of clothes(including pillow, bedsheet and blankets though), two medium boxes of shoes and one medium size box of bags... not mentioning all the CDs and books i've accumulated over the years. now there is hardly any space in my room to put my feet down. luckily i m not fat... (i hope no one objects to that).

went mac to buy lunch. coz guofeng say weifa is packing 'cute chicken' (quote) for them. i say the chicken is too cute for me. in fact it reminds me of exam... so i packed mac and went to the classroom to look for them and also to enjoy the air con. (hmm actually at this very moment my room is super duper windy and very cool, a beautiful saturday afternoon if not looking at the mess behind me.) well 4 lonely souls studying there: zhi shen, guofeng, chee kiong and benjamin. the poor guys who are taking DCS. later on weifa came with food and more gossiping begins. someone is volunteered by everyone else to help us shifting tomorrow. hehe coz he has strong arms? the cute chicken rice also became 黯然销魂饭. coz that particular someone choked and let a tear flow down. that should have never happened in front of zhi shen coz he could go on and on about the person is missing someone so he cried blah blah... reminds me of 大话西游, 有一个女孩子留了一样东西在我心里,是一滴眼泪. wahahahaha...

one interesting topic is about神雕侠侣. apparently the 雕 inside cannot fly but can run faster than a horse. (the horse thing is according to weifa, as if he has run with the 雕 before. so conclusion is the 雕 is not a 雕, it's a 鸵鸟...

graduation

2005-04-29T14:42:00.000+08:00

officially finished nus.

the last paper, is possibly, or most likely the worst paper i've had in nus, or rather, the worst i've done in my entire life. i think i left more than half of the paper untouched. no time and dunno how to do. first time ever, in history!

feel so cheated and defeated. not as if i've never studied. i left the exam hall area when people started discussing the questions that i didn't do... on my way back tear flowed down. how regretful it would be, that the end of my entire education is marked with a failure. ok maybe i wouldn't fail coz everyone is doing badly, but i can't take even a C. i've never had a C in the entire 4 yrs... end the whole thing with a grade that spoils my whole record will be my biggest 遗憾...

sigh... so this is the way i am graduating...

politically correct

2005-04-28T22:12:00.000+08:00

i sincerely hate politics. most of the time it sounds to me like children playing in cliches. if you friend him i won't friend you that kinda thing... perhaps it is much needed but i just hate to talk about it and hear about it. when it comes to politics, multiple standards apply and there is no definite answer. even logics dun apply... which makes it much worse than law.

recently, my friend KK and his friends are having some discussion about some political issues on his blog. to be specific, about the china-japan thing.

i posted some comments, and people are arguing back pointing out the mistakes made by chinese goverment, apparently pro-japan. all the issues of cultural revolution, tibet, tiananmen square were brought out as well no matter if they are relevant. being me, i had to point out where i think they are wrong.

this led me to think, why are people so hang up on debating about politics? they take a stand and then rebute everyone else who has a different view and think they are objective. i am not objective in this issue i admit. how can i? it involves my country of origin. i feel for it. and how about singaporeans as a third party? does that mean third parties are definitely objective? i bet to differ. who can get hold all the actual facts? i don't think there is anything as absolute truth in the first place. people in china might not have insights of how it is really like in japan. maybe they are influenced by propaganda. but how about those ppl criticizing china? how much do they really know about china?

if it can never be objective, and maybe some people don't know the subject matter well enough, what's so fun keeping talking about it? may i just say that, it doesn't matter what the actual truth really is coz we would never know, but it is more important to understand why people take such actions, what are the reasons and sentiments behind? after all, in politics, there is no absolute right or wrong, at most you can be politically correct, except for some things that can be judged by obvious moral standard.

talking politics for fun of course is harmless. but how about when it becomes offending to people who are actually involved? well i have to say i do feel a bit offended by all this talking. like i can't stand when people come and tell me tibet is an independent country. it is bloody not an indpendent country! it would be like saying singapore is part of malaysia. in this case i guess i looked for the trouble myself by reading KK's blog. but he's my friend, although i can't expect him to be so considerate as not to mention it at all because he has a friend from China, but... well... i m just thinking how much politics can affect ur personal relationships with people...

so, as a third party, shouldn't people really ask themselves do they really understand the parties involved in the event before they call themselves objective and make comments and site all those seemingly truth? personally i think, if not, they shouldn't take a stand at all coz it doesn't concern the third parties. that's y the america is hated by so many-being nosy.

and let's talk about the sentiments. i m not saying i agree with what the chinese are doing. but i m saying i understand the sentiments behind their actions. they may not know the absolute truth but they acted. why? coz they have this passion and it's in the culture. singapore culture is more peaceful and practical if i may say, not as emotional, not as passionate. someone has asked me why do chinese still resent the past so much? it's been so many generations. do i have any relatives killed by the japanese? yes i do, my great grandpa was a mechanical engineer who repairs aeroplanes for the chinese army during world war two and apparently his death was directly linked to the japanese's bombing. but well, i've never seen him before so i dun feel that sad. but that doesn't matter. coz you don't only feel passionate about something only if yourself has directly link with it, direct loss and benefits. there is an emotion called patriotism, called pride.

my point is, if the culture is different, there is a big gulf in between. so my suggestion is, before commenting, take a role switch.

comments are welcome but no side taking on china-japan issue and other politics k?

2005-04-28T21:49:00.000+08:00

white board drawing,click to enlarge

last day of mugging

2005-04-28T21:31:00.000+08:00

today is officially the last day of me mugging in school. a day of hating ACS, gossiping and fun and laughter.

it is amazing that even when some people are away, they can be gossiped about. the first thing i was told to do as i got into the classroom was to go to the neighbouring room to check out the drawing on the white board... well... i m going to post it here later so check it out. the left half of the drawing is the super spider crawling about with the tone of final count down. haha... that's a tribute to the dsta zai qiu who is also known as the ganjong spider. the right half featured zhishen as a crow flying by. down there got mickey and a pig. hmm... mickey was the one who drew the picture but he claims that he was cheated and betrayed.

anyway a lot of gossips today... as 'mickey' was trying to take revenge, we also caught wind of someone else's secret... wahahaha... so fun! but of course he subsequently got more suaning...

as blur and i concluded last night, all the gossip so far, or to be politically correct-most of the gossips so far, stemmed from one person... mr. ZS!!! no wonder he's portrayed as the 乌鸦... big mouth some more, zhi qiang who just joined us for studying recently also know i m BBSS already... duh... or as ler ming put it, this is a 'scandalous room'. coincidentally when he said it, zhi shen was sitting at the teacher's table, in the position to chair the scandalous room...

anyway at 8+, after i came back from toilet visiting, blur asked me if i smelled fermented bean curd as i entered the room. there indeed is such a smell, mixed with macdonald's fries etc and we were wondering where it is from. zhi qiang, sitting beside blur, with an innocent and serious face (he always has an innocent and serious face, 诚恳的脸), pointed at blur's feet... haha... tt's a very good one lor, coz he did it as if it was a matter of fact... and blur was on the rim of stabbing him with her pen knife. a few days ago, coz blur killed a cockroach in her room, she was named 小强杀手 by us. and 智强 can also be called 小强, so he deserves to be killed by blur anyway. hmm and that led us to think that it was written on someone's eraser '别人都怕怕,我最爱小强'. haha...

today i must remember to watch death of cleopatra on discovery channel!

2005-04-27T20:37:00.000+08:00

when ppl say 'rot in hell', do they mean come to singapore at this time of the year and sit at somewhere non-air conditioned in the middle of the day? the weather is killing! i can only comfort myself by saying 'i will have air con from 1st of May onwards!' 4 more days... how to sleep at night?

today blur said: 我感觉自己像一只充满了水的海蜇. it comes from the muscle ache both of us are suffering... punched too hard yesterday at kickboxing. i can't bend my back, and i can't reach to my back with my hands... there goes my comtemplation of sleeping naked to feel cooler, coz i would have difficulty taking my clothes off.

anyway, hello, is there anyone reading my blog? blur's blog got so many comments and mine is almost barren... sob sob... i sound boring do i? *jealous*

2005-04-26T00:54:00.000+08:00

hmm haven't concussed... just posted a damn long comment on KK's blog... guess i m very wordy today... yawns...

DARS paper and the cuppage expedition

2005-04-25T23:21:00.000+08:00

had second paper today.

actually woke up with a very heavy head... felt so dizzy that i could drop on the floor any minute. well when i looked at the floor it was actually rotating clockwise (ya my mind is still clear so i took notice of the direction of rotation). haha...

it's the first engin paper that i wrote so many words in the answer book, for a while it felt a bit like answering law paper... and... seems like making careless mistakes is my forte. why did i forget to not the outer product???? why why why???? it's such a simple question...

completed the paper 10min before the end of exam and couldn't bring myself to take another look at it coz if i do, i probably would really faint.

anyway, being incredibly bored and low morale, qh and i decided to go out for a movie and dinner to destress. watched 'be cool'. halfway through i was getting really restless. it's funny but the plot doesn't draw me in, it's just not tight enough. doesn't tickle me that much. maybe when americans watch 大话西游 they would feel the same way. but uma thurman is soooooo drop-dead gorgeous!!! totally adore her! and the combination of uma and john travolta is just enticing... and the rock looks so funny with that funny hair and moustache, the character is so contrasting with his wrestling profession, a gay that likes to wear red boots and spank his own ass, dreaming to be a star.

now comes the highlight of the day!

i have this magazine cutting from a i-weekly back in 2003 (i wonder why i still have it). it's about some authentic jap restaurant in town (maybe tt's y i kept it). i mentioned to qh before so he suggested to we check them out. as i dun haf the cutting with me and i only remember those restaraunt locate inside cuppage plaza and orchard plaza, we decided to have an expedition.

just for how many times in your whole life have you really been inside those two shopping centres? for me, cuppage plaza maybe once or twice, orchard plaza, nada... and as we really browse through, wow... it's a whole new world there...

headed to cuppage first. as soon as we go in, there is a jap place on the right hand side, it's called 饺子的王将(haha directly translation). no fancy restaurant setting, it's more like a hawker with a bar top counter and a few tables. menu written on long rectangular wooden flanks were hanging on top of the counter, written in japanese of course. walking further in is the ahodori, selling 串烧 and all kinds of chicken dishes. can smell it from quite far... and it smells like... good food... we took a peek inside and it's a very small restaurant, also with a bar top counter and a few tables. but at least this one is a proper restaurant. it looks like those 小吃店 we see in jap drama, looks very cosy.

anyway... i didn't really count, but the first 3 floors of cuppage plaza have at least 7 or 8 japanese restaurant, some of them look really really fanscinating and all look very authentic. can tell that coz all the menus are written in jap (some dun even have proper english translations) and a lot of japanese dine there. cuppage is a very empty building, the centre part of it is under renovation. but amazingly, all the jap restaurants we saw, have people eating inside and most of them are quite fully seated. of course for those fancy ones the price is kinda steep too. can go up to 50, 60 bucks per person.

qh was saying he's having a cultural shock all of a sudden. being a singaporean for 25yrs and never know such places existed. what's more is, we are actually in singapore but for a while we felt like we are tourists in japan. people around us speaking a language we dun understand and we can't even read the menu!!!

we went over to orchard plaza to take a look too but the restaurants there is not so densely populated so we gave up and went back to cuppage. due to budget constraint, we decided to try out the 饺子的王将. 顾名思义, the place is famous for its gyoza. it's definitely all handmade coz there is a person standing there making gyoza all the time. not like ajisen or some other places, use ready made frozen gyoza. i m not a jap food expert so i can't tell which branch of jap food it is, but it seems to me it's a hybrid of jap and chinese food coz there is 麻婆豆腐 and 回锅肉(川馆子??). there is one 天津饭 or sth like that, looks a lot like 蛋包饭. egg on the outside and rice inside. but we saw people eating it only after we made our order. tried the set of a ramen with 6 pieces gyoza, about 13 to 15 dollars, net price, no gst or service charge coz it operates more like a hawker. for the dining environment, it's a bit expensive, but when the food arrives i tell you it's totally worth it comparing to places like sakae sushi, ajisen... the gyoza is really really nice! and the roast pork in the ramen... the fats literally melt in my mouth!!! the soup is also very very nice! 不油不腻又很香. what's more is i dun feel very thirsty after eating the whole bowl of noodle (very big portion), so probably no MSG?

then there was the highlight of the highlight!

two tables away from us, seated two guys who are obviously japanese. the one facing me got very small eyes (KK if you are reading this i guess tt's y blur said u look like jap), and the one facing qh has this look that is totally not masculine, but he doesn't look like a girl. there is something about him that you can conclude he's a guy, but a very 秀气 kinda guy, with nicely cut and styled hair dyed in golden apricot, wearing baby blue singlet with a grey jumper thrown over the shouler, army green khaki pants tied at the ankle and nike sneakers. and he has this porcelain complexion!!!! 白里透红,滑不留手,一点都不油! kill me now! there is only one word to describe his look: pretty!!! think along the line of 泷则秀明 when he was younger, nothing less than that. it's those type of guys that even guys think he's pretty and make girls go crazy and wanna take care of him. it's the look that makes people feel very 心疼... perfect candidate for 姐弟恋, or sth like 魔女的条件 whahahaha...

i m kicking myself for not sitting on the other side of the table. coz even qh can't stop beoing him... and i had to stand up pretending i m refilling ice water (ice water is self serviced) to take a look at his front view. it's the first time ever, that a guy is making a guy(presumed to be heterosexual) and a girl going gaga at the same time. and it's the time when a camera handphone would be useful lor and both of us dun haf... ahhhhh...

anyway dun get me wrong, he doesn't look or behave sissy at all. and there was once he laughed out loud and the laughter sound very much a guy. and he eats in this slow and graceful manner... aiyo... i dunno if they noticed us beoing them. haha we must have looked like two old perverts.

after they finished their food they paid and left. hmm... well... he is short... but nvm, those we guessed they are maybe around 16, 17 yrs old only so he still have a chance to grow taller. but may he preserve that porcelain complexion...

on the way back i was really feeling sick. my whole body feels very sore... maybe having a low fever. and best part of all is when i finally reached my room i realised i didn't bring my key. called blur and she's at orchard. diao... only if i realised my key is missing a little bit earlier, i could have met her in town and wouldn't have to spend 40min waiting.

but in the end i finally got my key from her and it seems like i've spent almost an hour writting this blog. i m going to go concuss now and hopefully dream of that pretty boy... wahahahahaha... ya i do sound like an old pervert now...

2005-04-25T00:37:00.000+08:00

tiramisu, in english it means pick me up. it's a desert that i really like. tried a lot of versions, some too bitter, some too sweet, some contains too much alcohol, some got weird texture. is baking an art? balancing all the ingredients and tailor to taste buds of different individuals.

i googled and never found the historical story of tiramisu as told in the movie. does it really have anything to do with love? i therefore doubt, if love really tastes like tiramisu... then what does your love taste like?

i am but a stupid girl who gets touched by even lame lame lame shows...

first paper and etc

2005-04-23T19:29:00.000+08:00

had first paper today. law. very long haven't woken up so early already... feeling so tired for the whole day.

another afternoon spent studying in school and apparently no one is really in the mood. lazy and blur and i were sitting on a bench outside the classroom, enjoy the air con blowing out from the room and the guys were inside. and blur started folding paper airplanes and throwing them inside... this started the airplane war. a lot of throwing in and out of the room was going on.

being guys, of course they don't want to admit defeat, but since the guys do not know how to fold the plane, they went searching for the methods on internet.... *sweat*

a group of little kids... haiz... only the sweet couple stayed out of it.

after researching, they built the merlion 1, a model piloted by jeffrey.

being guys again, once they started the plane building business, they couldn't stop any more and played around with it for very long, while we girls have already settled down to study. but anyway war was over there is world peace again!

anyway a very unproductive afternoon so blur and i decided to leave early. on our way out of engin, outside lt7a that area, we heard purring of a cat. and there it is, up on the staircase that leads to lt7. purring non-stop with its sad little voice and staring at a couple of little little birds. we thought it's hungry. then it lay down, looking very obedient and cute, and looked and purred at us. but when we went up the staircase to approach it, it stood up in alert. sob sob... the cat is scared of us...

being kind hearted as we are, we thought we should get sth for the cat to eat but nowhere is open. there is a vending machine nearby so we bought a pack of vitasoy (which is an alternative to milk) and cut a square hole on it. as we placed it in front of the cat, it came over to sniff it but then proceeded to lie down beside it without even licking... sob sob sob... the cat doesn't like vitasoy... so 不给面子...

2005-04-22T21:06:00.000+08:00

these days are no good... the weather is ridiculously hot and stuffy. last night i couldn't sleep for no reason. in the end i got up at 3am in the morning and packed a box. time to start packing. i hate packing... i hate hate hate packing...

last few days of nus... i thought about taking a camera and take photographs of my room, and places i go to daily, like engin canteen... last few days of nus... 4 yrs and it is coming to an end. although i didn't exactly have a wonderful life here, somehow the fengshui of nus is sort of against me. but indeed there is a lot a lot of precious memories and i do feel melancholy leaving it. i feel sad packing. i feel sad i m leaving this room of mine. although it's small and it's messy. it's directly opposite the lift and cockroach has visited once.

after graduation, would things change? of course they do. nothing stays the same always. will people drift apart? maybe... but effort can always be put in for us to remain close friends. let's just hope, when things change, they change for the better.

tomorrow is the first paper. good luck everyone!

get Xiaxue's God out of my room!

2005-04-21T00:44:00.000+08:00

thanks a million to my very brave neighbour shin shin who helped me check out on the cockroach...

it is indeed behind the shelf. she says the feelers are still moving but more dead than not liao. and she scooped up the insect with a piece of paper carried it away mumbling 'it's dead liao, so poor thing...' the cockroach is so poor thing ah? it scared me until half dead lor... anyway when she got it out i had to stand far far away and couldn't even bring myself to look at it. one glimpse is more than enough to make all my hair stand...

but thank goodness now i can sleep in peace...

A HAIR RAISING EXPERIENCE

2005-04-21T00:33:00.000+08:00

IMAGINE HOW STUNNED I WAS WHEN I TURNED AROUND AND SAW A COCKROACH THAT'S ABOUT 2INCHES EXCLUDING FEELERS ON MY WALL!!!!

I WAS SO STUNNED I COULDN'T EVEN SCREAM... TOTALLY DISGUSTED!!!!!!!!! A COCKROACH IN MY ROOM! IT'S THE FIRST TIME EVER AND THE FIRST TIME EVER I'VE COME SO NEAR TO SUCH A BIG ONE...

I DUNNO WHERE I FOUND THE COURAGE TO SPRAY INSECTICIDE ON IT BUT I DID. AND IT WENT BEHIND MY SHELF...

errr... out of my wit now... dunno what to do... think either i can't sleep tonight or i will have to sleep with my head facing the other side... i am totally grossed out and freaked out!!!!

retribution... talking about cockroaches on my blog and now i got one in my room... i m so super alert now...

2005-04-20T22:37:00.000+08:00

today is a bad day for studying... feeling very lethargic, having a headache and sore eyes. be it DARS or ACS, it's equally boring and hard to digest...

hmm... should anyone trust blur to wake up lazy and sleepy in the morning? haha... sounds so suspicious...

2005-04-20T01:59:00.000+08:00

this might be some sort of a sensitive issue, but let me not approach it in that very edgy way.

first of all i must emphasise that i am NOT advertising for Xiaxue and her blog. i just happen to find this particular incident quite interesting. her friend recently died in a bike accident (this is not the part that's interesting, condolescence to the deceased). and there was this very insensitive pastor that evanglised at the funeral by starting of with 'let me take this opportunity to...' by all means, Xiaxue is furious and i kinda of agree with her. this is the particular post. last time i checked there were 241 comments. wow...

but this topic has been debated times and times again and i do not wish to enter the war zone. what i really find interesting is the post follows it. in it, she started by saying she believes God is a 12-feet hairy flying cockroach and she's so scared she'll go anywhere the God puts her to be. it sounds rude ya? and read the comments. it seems that she's developed her own belief system.

since constitution has granted us freedom of religion (law notes slide11). no one can accuse her of being rude to other religions. coz come on, she's talking about her own. and she can make it anyhow she wants it to be. so the philosophy behind is. when she tells you about the Cockism (the name she gave to it), you might find it as total crap, but when a person from another religion be it catholism or christian or taoism or buddism or whatever preaches, she has every right on the earth to find it total crap too. so if people do not like her preach of Cockism, they better not preach to her. haha i must admit i find it quite smart...

2005-04-19T17:51:00.000+08:00

mugging in school now and typing on guofeng's laptop while he is away.

just now we all watched this documentary about ancient cosmetic surgery on discovery channel. it's so amazing what they could do thousands of years back in India, Egypt and the Roman Empire... some have live human disected some more... gross... amazing also how far humans could go for beauty and how the ancient medical techiniques advanced.

and then later on somehow someone mentioned the thing 守宫砂 and we were all wondering how does it actually work. googled and there is no satisfactory explanation. the only thing we know is that it uses some kind of lizard that eats scorpians, feed it with 朱砂 until it's all red. then pound it to power and inject into the arm of the virgin girl. the type of lizard is called 守宫 so the name comes from the lizard and not the purpose of the thing. so far the most likely explanation is that it's done on the 经脉 and as the 'thing' is done, 会动了真气 then the thing will disappear.

lerming tried to google with 'chastity mark' and only porn sites came out. haha... so basically maybe western medicine cannot explain it bah...

haha i guess we are just sooooo bored...

oh was just reminded the topic was brought up as that the virginity of lerming's eraser was taken away by lazy... hahahahahahaha

let's twist again!

2005-04-18T21:11:00.000+08:00

the 60s is back! the twist! haha... had a very fun amore session today with brancy. we did a lot of twisting, up and down, shaking the shoulders, to and fro, and the leg jittering thingee... haha it's more like a dance lesson than an aerobics one. when i was already so tired she played this very nice jazzy tune and led us to do a really fun dance and i was immediately perked up. visualising uma thurman and john travolta in pulp fiction.

2005-04-18T01:49:00.000+08:00

i've caught the self-reflection virus.

looking back at this semester... lots of things happened... and i spent most of the time in a hermit kinda lifestyle. basically i never lingered in school longer than necessary and had been locking myself in my <10 square meter room eating, sleeping, coding, typing, slacking, surfing, stoning... i guess i m spending 70% of my waking time with my computer. could have married it if it was legal.

as a result, now i am suffering from overdose of solitude... actually it's since the beginning of year4 i guess, first i m losing friends i dun see in lessons, then this sem i m losing the remaining ones. for some unknown reasons, tragically my social circle has shrunk to almost non-existent. now as i see some of my old friends around in school, to whom i haven't been talking to for at least over a year or two, i dunno if i should/i m too lazy to/it feels weird to say hi.

next before i knew it, nus will be over for me and there is all the hussle of shifting house, flying home for my longer period of hibernation in a different country. when i finally come back and try to re-civilize myself, everyone else would be working and the lost threads are even harder to pick up... long gone are the days of over-booking... now writing this blog is my desperate attempt at connecting myself with the outside world but most of the time it just feel like i m talking to myself and no one is listening...

i feel like i m in a very weird place right now... use an old phrase: trapped in my own world...

done with law test and watchint triumph show

2005-04-16T23:03:00.000+08:00

sometimes i hate myself.

when a decision is made and later regretted, what do you do? do u carry on with it or do a U-turn? carrying on, you would sometimes find yourself wondering 'what am i doing here?'. doing a U-turn, though, sometimes you regret it again and fall into a oscillation pattern. making a not so good decision is not the most horrible thing, the most horrible is trying to do something to remedy the situation and realising it just got worse. and then in the end i just find myself a horrible person. i guess there are just periods of time that i find myself as a total failure and nothing is going to be right. is that normal?

well.. the above post has nothing to do with the title. lingerie models are the most horrible lot. as they are wearing so little, i really can see how tall and skinny they are. they seriously have legs up until... like the height of my head? hmm but apparently the national tv decided they are not going to have any thong and g-string scenes.

my favourite parts of the show are the few guys inside and the two husky doggies. i saw the chest jittering guy finally, as mentioned in xiaxue's blog. he is really cute!

happy birthday blur and zhishen!

2005-04-16T01:57:00.000+08:00

despite the slight unpleasant argument that ended my day - to the friend in question if you are reading my blog, i understand how you feel and i apologies for any harsh lecturing tones i might has used, but i stand my ground of views and i hope this doesn't affect our friendship - today is actually quite a nice day.

played badminton in the morning and had a very full lunch at arts canteen. afterwards studied law with the bugs and co in the classroom until 10+ in the evening. had quite a lot of discussion of all the clauses, doctrines blah blah... considered myself quite hardworking today.

and... highlight of the evening! it's blur's birthday today! (or rather yesterday coz it's 2am in the morning now) and zhishen's birthday on sunday. so we put together a mini celebration with a cake, some candles and one pathetic balloon. haha... hope they were truly happy... but i guess the planning wasn't as discreet as it was supposed to be with all our phones beeping at the same time. here are some pics:

blur is so scared the balloon will burst.

looks better with the lights on

all of us

another one of all of us

the one with the balloon. hee wrong setting of cam so it's exceptionally small.

i shrunk the pictures to fit the page. looks horrible hor? for the orginals, go here.

2005-04-16T01:22:00.000+08:00

i went online for a short while just now and had sort of an argument with a friend from yr3. he is doing VIP with nus and very unsatisfied with his $300/mth pay that he gets. as soon as i went online he messaged me to ask what is the average vip pay. since i did IA instead and very very few of my friends did VIP so i said i m not sure. but given that nus pays $450/mth for IA (in fact they pay all companies that get IA students from nus that amount), i think for a shorter term like VIP, 300 is reasonable. then he started saying some of his frenz are getting 700 and he heard average is 500. i assumed these friends of him are doing it with outside companies and i told him that it's very different inside and outside nus.

there he started calculation of what is his daily pay and what is his transport and food cost, concluding 300 is far from sufficient. i was getting a bit impatient and i got very contradicting views. so i told him sth like this: while you are a student, your prime duty is to study and not earn money. vip provides you a good chance to learn so be happy if you got a position at all. what you learn now decides how much you would be paid later after you graduate. now you shouldn't really be concerned about the pay.

that is truly what i think. the prime aim of an attachment, of course is to learn right? because for bigger bucks any one of us could easily go and teach tuition. if he's so unhappy with the pay nus gives him, he could have chosen to do it with outside companies if he could find. well if he couldn't, then do with what he has and be happy he could find one at all. some of my friends last year couldn't get any IA position and had to squeeze schedule like crazy in the end. and most of them, just settled for whatever offered to them. there is not bargaining of pay. look at it this way, if you don't do it, you would be paying school fees and getting no pay at all. and there are many people who do attachment with no pay, just for the experience, just to learn things.

there he went, telling me his working hr is like 8 to 5 every day (isn't it normal?) and he's doing programming, independent project. i was getting truly impatient now. 'no one pays for my fyp.' i said. which is the bitter truth. independent proj, checked. programming, checked. longer term than a vip, checked. graded, checked. not paid a single cent and a lot of shit from professors, checked.

and then he was telling me i sound offensive, and he's in no mood for a lecture. i thought about it. maybe my tone was really a bit harsh so i said sorry for the harsh tone but i do have very contradicting views as you. and still he went on and on blaming me. i said sorry, isn't that enough?

well... putting myself in his shoes, probably he's pissed now about the pay after comparing with his friends. (but hey, that's just part and parcel of life. vip positions is largely based on luck not merit. and let me state my point again, this is a time to learn not earn money so really don't need to be so concerned about the pay.) probably he just needs someone who would just listen to him whine and complain and take the same stand as him and show some sympathy. too bad i m not that person because i really don't think he's that ill treated.

i m just thinking... are students nowadays asking too much? we want lessons that are interesting and relevant to the real world, we want less school work and higher grade, we want a prestigious certificate, we want more exposure, we also want reduced school fee, and now we want school to give us high pay. what happened to the attitude?

2005-04-14T19:43:00.000+08:00

i threw away more than half of my lecture notes from the past 7 semesters coz i have the soft copy and the hard copy looks very clean... hmm so i figured that i don't always take notes in lectures... haha wat's the news?

this feels good!

swing!

2005-04-13T18:54:00.000+08:00

there are two types of people in this world, one can swing and the other cannot. haha...

watched swing girls today. it's such a nice show! cosy and funny and the theme is about swing! big band! my favourite type of jazz!!! cute japanese girls, funny plot and beautiful music, what more can you ask for? it's such a pity that they didn't show it in all cinemas and have a massive publicity. coz it's really nice!!!!! left me happy and hopping for the rest of the day!

L, is for the way you look at me
O, is for the only one I see
V, is very, very extraordinary
E, is even more than anyone that you adore

Love is all
That I can give to you
Love is more
Than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart
And please don't break it
Love was made
For me and you

*smiling and singing to myself*

2005-04-13T01:35:00.000+08:00

a bit stoned now...

after i happily came back to my room after DARS test, opened my email inbox, *BONG* a bomb has just been dropped. just when i tot i m done with fyp, my sup wants me to archive my stuff (which is fine), including inside a user's guide and a programmer's guide. hmpf... user's guide. i have it in the help file of my application so i could just copy and paste, but programmer's guide? what is it for? ya it's for the next unfortunate fyp student who comes along when the prof thinks hey let's do an extension of that project!

the thing is, when i started my project, how come i had nothing to guide me? worse still, all the comments written by the post grad of whom i've taken over the code are written in chinese! i know no programming language in chinese! (shame of me? but tt's the truth!)

anyway, i shall be the kind soul to the next unfortunate fyp student... 19 pages... tt's almost half of the length of my thesis... phew... but got it finished.

went to amore this evening with blur and had a good workout, followed by good dinner at chinatown. the mutton soup is ever so yummy! and sotong, and kangkong... one funny thing happened on our way back. as we reached the platform of outram mrt, a train was just leaving. the door was still open but it was already beeping. it's quite crowded inside so there is not much room at the door. blur dashed for it and i hesitated. one step slower and i was cut off. we stared at each other in astonishment through the glass as the train drove away... i tot this kinda thing only happends to teenagers. haha...

2005-04-10T23:43:00.000+08:00

haha heard straits times gave one whole page to the 'propose love in lecture' thingee happened some time ago. and there was interview of the guy Gary Ng and the prof. a lot of different views were given as well. hmm the power of media...

2005-04-10T23:36:00.000+08:00

possible explanation for the red thread in the air:

1. my first reaction - there is a giant mutant spider
2. which logically comes with the first (provided by qh) - spiderman paid a visit
3. someone was trying to fly a kite sitting on the tree and the kite was caught on the roof of my block (not the other way round coz there is no kite on the tree).
4. since it was likely that the thread was led to 8th floor of my block where the laundry room is, i was thinking maybe someone's clothes got so torn up a long thread was blown out of the window and somehow landed on the tree.
5. a girl was having an affair with a guy staying on the 8th floor and she had to have an escape route.
6. 月老在牵红线的过程中撞到了树上.

click on the photo below to see an enlarged version. the red arrows are pointing to the thread.

2005-04-10T18:12:00.000+08:00

there is this weird red thread like thingee hanging somewhere across the middle of the air, outside my window. it may looks like it starts from the window, but it is not. it starts from the tree at the background. and i dunno where the other end goes to coz it stretches all the way up to the sky and it was too bright to see.

2005-04-10T14:16:00.000+08:00

lucky days dun last... think i m falling sick...

just finished a 2-hr law lecture, and feeling horribly dizzy... anyway i sped up the webcast to 1.5x the original speed and still could hear it clearly. that is just how slowly the lecturer normally talks. haiz... one more to go... must clear the debt today.

just realised last night if i were to go home in early May and coming back only mid June, i would have to pay the June rental before i leave. seriously broke... i estimate i would be cleaned out after paying for all the deposit, rental, plane tix and daily expenditure from now till the day i leave.

anyway just some thoughts... things are getting settled one by one, which is good. shall use the already over-used word again that we are all at the crossroad of life. basically meaning we are facing big changes in our lifestyles, living environments and so on. probably compared to certain people, i am considered advanturous and my lifestyle is sort of chaotic. yes i dislike mundane routine and i want excitement, so i embrace changes... sometimes. the bottom line is, as long as not everything is changing at the same time, that would be too overwhelming. in the swirl and twirl, i would like to hold on to something unchanging, something solid, something i could fall back on. maybe, like a cosy room of my own... that's y i dislike shifting, no matter how good the new house looks. i get used to the old house, and i create my own comfort zone there.

a new house, a new neighbourhood, new roommates*, new job, new timetable, new travelling pattern, new lifestyle as a whole... i felt like i m swept off my feet, or going to be, in a not so positive way. would i like the job? would the pay be enough? would we live in harmony? would... now the feeling is like... a lot of anticipation mixed with anxiety and distress.

still a lot of things to discuss and settle...

2005-04-10T01:33:00.000+08:00

all my life, i have known that when bad things happen, they happen together. now for the very first time as i remember, that i realise good things also can happen together. as of yesterday, i even broke my old faithful 95 curse. for twice, it actually came just as i reach the bus stop, instead of leaving me staring at its butt. not only on me, but on my friends as well... found my jeans, found a house, found jobs and good positions. haha am i not the lucky star? dun worry greedy, it would be ur turn soon.

my new levi's

2005-04-09T23:38:00.000+08:00

2005-04-09T21:58:00.000+08:00

springdale condominium at bukit timah... the future home of the bugs! finally... after so much of searching up and down... we would have a home... yeah! so tired but at least got it done... feeling accomplished. hehe luck is good these two days.

levi's ah levi's

2005-04-08T23:14:00.000+08:00

2005-04-08T22:28:00.000+08:00

yeah! i m done! effectively half graduated! examiner is friendly and nice, didn't ask many questions. in the end was chatting with him after the thing and he's very sympathetic saying c++ programming is hard. wahahaha...

2005-04-08T13:20:00.000+08:00

it's almost time to go... my last presentation... the end of the project that lasted almost one whole year... am i nervous? can't say as much. more of an anxious feeling... i dun have a speech prepared, and i can give a presentation any time. have been slacking the whole day yesterday, flipping through my thesis and slides as if there is so much to do. but no, there is not. numb numb numb... come, let's get it over and done with!

2005-04-07T22:18:00.000+08:00

this medicine friend of mine is devastated that some rich egoistic guy donated a 100mil to nus and med fac is renamed after him: yong loo lin school of medicine. now his 'trashy education' (quote him) has a trashy name to match.

what is it about naming a school/award/building etc after a person's name? isn't it only people who have invaluable achievements and contributions in history have this kinda things named after them? like Nobel Prize, or the Oscar (whom i remember as someone's uncle). so, since today money can buy you anything, just throw in a lump sum and likelihood is you will have the name of a school under your belt and if the school does well, you will be famous. of course there is always a risk to take. what if the school sucks? woohoohoohoo... just bought yourself a bad reputation. therefore, nus medical school costs 100 million. they have just established their price. if this yong loo lin guy is willing to settle for some lower grade college he probably need to only spend 10% of that. somehow it sounds to be like high class prostitution and street hooker.

nus always does this. look at how many names do we have here. HSSM library. Yew Siew Toh conservatory of music, C J Koh law library, dun forget the place i m staying in, kouk foundation house. have i missed out any?

you would say, hey what's wrong with that? he make monetary contribution so as a gesture of appreciation something is named after him. fair enough. the thing i m thinking about here is about branding. people come to nus medical school because it is well known (how well known i m not sure, haha but if it's not that well established i think the yong loo lin guy is wasting his money then). but now it sounds like a private institution that provides no recognized formal education. to establish this name again, i would think some time is needed. i dun haf any examples here but i would say some schools do not change their names for whoever's sake, because their name is the most valuable asset.

well let's just hope the donor doesn't go bankrupt or get involved in some scandal else nus med fac graduates will be referred to students from that scandalous name faculty.

爱情　张楚

2005-04-05T14:57:00.000+08:00

你坐在我对面　看起来那么端庄　我想我应该也很善良　
我打了个哈欠　也就没能压抑住我的欲望　
这时候我看见街上的阳光很明亮　

刚好这时候你没有什么主张　刚好这时候你正还喜欢幻想　
刚好这时候我还有一点主张　我想找个人一起幻想　

我说我爱你　你就满足了　
你搂着我　我就很安详　
你说这个城市很脏　我觉得你挺有思想　
你说我们的爱情不朽　我看着你　就信了　

我躺在我们的床上　床单很白　
我看见我们的城市　城市很脏　
我想着我们的爱情　它不朽　它上面的灰尘一定会很厚　

我明天早晨打算离开　即使你已经扒光了我的衣裳　
你早晨起来死在这床上　即使街上的人还很坚强

2005-04-05T14:34:00.000+08:00

什么是好音乐? 我觉得就是,不管身在何时何地,总能把我带回一种意境的音乐. 可能是快乐得想起舞的华尔兹,也可能是愤世的摇滚. 就是音乐一起,就感觉整个世界都是我的电影大布景,演的可能是悲剧,喜剧. 也许这就是为什么movie soundtrack都很好听, 和剧情都联系起来了.

这两天一直在听以前的中国摇滚什么的... 回忆起以前的好多时光. 人都是有阶段性的. 想想以前小的时候,也有那么一阵子,特别想当一个流浪歌手的情人. 就是找一个老狼或者黄磊那样有点忧郁的整天弹吉他给我听. 后来就迷上了张楚. the bugs 应该记得那会儿我整天扯着嗓子喊'蚂蚁蚂蚁蚂蚁蚂蚁蝗虫的大腿,蚂蚁蚂蚁蚂蚁蚂蚁蜻蜓的眼睛...'. 还有'一块红布'什么的. 抱一把吉他用了吃奶的力气strum. 超没形象. 后来又有一阵子想当一个北京愤青,看了一大堆颓书,张驰的'北京病人',那个谁我忘了的'像草一样不能自拔',棉棉的'糖',高晓松的'挂在墙上的脸'.最经典的是石康的'摇摇晃晃','支离破碎'. 看到'在一起'的时候觉得不行了,颓到底该振作了. 那段猛听新裤子,'我愿意,我愿意,享受这痛苦的每一天'... 每一个阶段,都好像是拥有一个我自己的秘密花园,藏着我的喜怒哀乐. 完全自我,完全美好. 就像王小波说的,是我的精神食粮.

最近看到消息说超载的高旗去玩冰上赛车了. 唉... 他是不是都不会老啊? 跟N多年以前一样帅... 绝对是我的那一型... 小眼睛... 超有气质...

2005-04-04T22:44:00.000+08:00

monday 5.30pm hi/lo lesson at cineleisure is very fun! the instructor is so cute haha! feeling good!

well today there was a weird conversation during lunch. i can't quite remember how it was initiated. something about someone being hairy. and somehow before i realised how it happened the guys were talking about hair near... hmm... the unmentionable... no not what you are thinking... it's the backdoor they were talking about. big ray had some doubt if there is hair there at all and the rest were absolutely certain about it, having discovered the hair in various ways in some point of time in their lives. and then they were urging him to go back home and use digi cam to take photo and blah blah... too gross to go on...

and somebody raised a question asking what the body hair is for coz it seems kinda extra. ok the armpit hair is to facilitate sweating and dissipation of heat and toxins. hair inside nosetrils and ears are there to trap dust and keep it warm. (hey this is not applicable in singapore but it is true k? when i went to 哈尔滨 that year and the temperature was -30 degrees, it literally freezed in my nose when i breathed in cold air, a very funny and interesting feeling). eyelash no need to say is to protect the eyes. but how about eyebrows and chest hair and leg hair, arm hair, or hair on your head? bingjie suggested chest hair is for girls to see and melt... which is not very convincing... btw small ray got an idea that armpit hair is to prevent sweat flowing down along your arm... left me speechless...

oh and stories were told about bingjie eating banana in brunei jungle and air diving. two separate stories were linked with plenty of imagination.

木村拓哉 for levi's ad

2005-04-03T18:59:00.000+08:00

hot hot hot!!!!
drooling all over the place...

2005-04-02T16:57:00.000+08:00

this morning while we were having law tutorial and yean yean was talking about all those previous cases, two people sitting beside me mentioned that how come all the cases we study are english cases, (well i tot it's a common knowledge that singapore follows english law system?), and joked about there isn't any chinese cases mentioned, probably they don't even have trial in china.

at this point of time i happened to be looking into that direction and overheard that conversation, so i gave them a stare. they soon realised it was not very appropriate and the person sitting right next to me tried to apologize. well, i knew they were joking and although not very pleansant i could still take it as a joke. what made it worse was the way he apologized. 'but it's true right? that law system in china never really evolved from the past?'

now here, is that a question or statement? i m not sure. to me it sounds more like a statement with a question mark for decoration. even if he did want to ask such a question, he already had that assumption in mind that china is still a barbaric country with an emperor who chops off people's heads as he wishes. this person, from what i know about him, means no harm. but i think he has really watched way too much tv and knew very little about the real world out there.

if you are going to make a judgement about something you are not familiar with, could you at least do some background research to find out more before making some rash statement? i know it's natural that people in singapore view chinese nationals with some prejudice and they think china is not such a developed country as singapore. but hello, i can deal with strangers who think we chinese students trying to rent a house will bring guys back to stay over (different guys each night some more) and do drugs in her house, but i dun want to get into such situation with my own friends who have known me for a few years.

let's just say, when china still had emperors, there was already law. the famous justice bao? heard of that couch potatos? in fact countries like china, india have very long history of established law system. (hey the lecturer said that k? were u listenning? btw i dun think there is a perfect law system anywhere lor. if singapore law is so perfect why do u think he has to be so sarcastic?) put the past aside. well, the law system in china probably is a bit different from singapore. and the country is undergoing big transition in social and economical aspect, so the transition and development in law system might not be totally in pace with that. there might be loopholes here and there. but it is evolving, fast! it's 21st century and china is hosting olympics in 3yrs time!

my point is, if you really don't know, it's ok. but dun make assumptions, dun prejudice, at least be open about it and enquire. there is a whole world outside singapore. ok?

孤独的人是可耻的

2005-04-02T01:47:00.000+08:00

10年了,魔岩三杰回来了.

以前人们说,张楚死了,窦唯成仙了,何勇疯了. 现在他们都回来了. 1997年,张楚一首孤独的人是可耻的,一炮而红. '这是一个恋爱的季节,空气里都是情侣的味道,孤独的人是可耻的.' 那是个新音乐的春天. 他的善良,他的无奈,他的孤独寂寞,他的诗一样的音乐,曾经那么打动我. 几年没有听了. 在满街都是周杰伦的时候,张楚又回来了. 2005年3月,在北京的复出演唱会,他老了,只是眼神还是那样寂寞,那样没落.

苍凉的'西出阳关',伤感的'姐姐',美丽的'结婚',快乐的'蚂蚁'... 感动依旧... 从心里唱出来的声音,多少年都是不变的.

2005-03-30T23:44:00.000+08:00

that guy who did the thing in the lecture is a bloody idiot! so is the lecturer! how did he even get his doctor degree? i wonder if he's married at all... it's been well known that engineers are not tactic in BGR, but this bad?

blur's friend has managed to dug out the blog of the girl in question. poor thing... seems like she's a nice girl with a good sense of humour, but badly affected by the incident. not only the guy's proposal is a failure, the guy himself is a total failure. hey you go girl! give him a slap in the face and ask him to wake up his ideas! better do it in public too so that to show you got nothing to do with him, since he tried to show in public that he wants to has something to do with you.
http://www.crapofcw.blogspot.com/
http://crapofcw.blogspot.com/2005/03/random-thoughts-i-think-that-i-should.html

2005-03-29T22:52:00.000+08:00

anyway for the link in the previous post. i've broken it up so u would have to join them back together. somehow the html code kinda linkage doesn't work...

2005-03-29T21:48:00.000+08:00

ok. for those who hasn't seen the now well known lecture in which a guy, liased with e lecturer, revealed his feelings for this girl in the middle of the lesson, armed with a bouquet of flowers...

here you go. login with nus ID and forward to about 57min, just before the break.

gosh... how cliche can ppl get? declare love in public? with a power point slide and help of lecturer some more... so damn embarrassing for the girl... the lecturer is a pimp! i would have rejected the guy straight in the face if i were her. anyway apparently now this is big, all over nus. coz a friend from medicine just mentioned it. (for the record, medicine fac is like in another universe from the rest of us?) according to him, medicine guys would never do such a thing. well, good for them! engin guys... what had happened to you all?

it's my personal opinion that those who hold a bouquet of flowers and stand outside LT door on V-day is just second of this brave act in lecture.

2005-03-29T18:37:00.000+08:00

well... it's time to update sth here. actually nothing much happening. having tests, writing thesis, technical paper etc... just when you think you've gotten sth done, then *bomb*, there is, sth new to do. after submitting all the papers books whatever, there are still 3 tests, and the final presentation. not mentioning the exam is coming right after all these things. but well... if i really do study for the tests, i guess i dun need to study for exam any more.

graduation is making its full appearance. job interviews, house hunting, registering for commencement and measuring own head for the stupid looking gown. taking silly photos all around engin for the graduation annual...

i'm graduating! i m moving out of school! i m going out there to face the cruelty of the working world!!!

first house seeing

2005-03-27T17:44:00.000+08:00

had our first house seeing today. a condo at braddell view. it's big and airy, in a quiet environment. the living room downstairs is roomy enough for a party and the bedrooms upstairs are quite big as well. i like the gigantic wardrobes. but there is no table and chair and beds and sofa... the walk btw the train station to the place is not long, but the path looks quite deserted. basically the neighbourhood doesn't look quite vibrant. so decision still pending. will have to look at more houses for comparison.

haha exciting! we are seeing houses together and moving in together soon!

usage of the little finger

2005-03-25T19:31:00.000+08:00

1. to play some instruments (in the case of guitar, can chop off the one on the right hand, if u play drums, both then.).

2. to be raised when holding knife, fork, cup etc, in order to look feminine.

3. to hang the key chain when the hands are occupied.

4. to wear the pinki ring.

5. to dig nose (not neccessary for people with gorilla's nostrils).

6. to type (only when you follow the fingering rules).

7. to replace the middle finger when you think raising the latter at people seems too rude of you but can't help doing it. (ask blur and lazy)

8. to look normal

if you can think of any, please add on.

2005-03-25T18:18:00.000+08:00

worte a law essay today, and thesis is halfway through. feeling incredibly bored of sch work so took a little break and drew this. now this is when a scanner comes in handy. digi cam captures is no good... the shades doesn't look right.

community living and locked pantry

2005-03-22T13:13:00.000+08:00

i have just received this mass email from my RA(resistant assistant aka a girl that i really dislike). during a spot check either yesterday or today, the office people had found the pantry opposite room 617 (on the other end of the corridor from my room) is indecently dirty and decided to lock it up. now this RA who stays beside me (another fact that i hate coz she is very loud) decided to get some volunteers to clean it up (i got no idea how when it is locked up. break in?) or keep it locked and impose a 10 dollars fine on EVERYONE on this floor, to hire more cleaners. and then she asks everyone of us to label the food we put in the fridge and label the expiry date as well, else she'll throw it all away.

firstly, issit legal for a non-authoritive person to impose a fine as she wishes? not mentioning that not EVERYONE is using that damn pantry. as for me, never set foot there before. how fair is that i've got to pay to clean up other people's ass?

and about the cleaner, isn't it the management's duty to hire cleaners? since when should the students pay for that? the cleaning lady we have now, according to the same RA, is 70 yrs old and suffering from all kinds of disease possible. then why on earth is she still hired if she can't do a good job? not that i am not sympathetic but this is a student residence not a welfare organisation.

to label the food in the fridge, fine. but on every tiny little thing? nah... i dun think so. further more, label expiry date? are you kidding me? how long can a piece of ginger last? dun ask me, i dunno... hmm... how about the left over food i m keeping for the next meal? should i label it as one day or two days? eggs... hmm let me see? typically one months? how about frozen meat? forever? this girl has either no brain or no common sense.

2005-03-21T21:23:00.000+08:00

have u ever wondered where did all those teenage gals get their super cutie blog background from? is their generation so techno savvy that they are equipped with the advanced knowledge of html coding and web hosting at a tender age of 14 while i still have no clue (a little bit now hopefully after struggling to make changes to my own template) at 24? now i got an answer, quite a comforting one: http://www.blogskin.com

it's full of those cutie web backgrounds that you see on singaporean teenage gals blogs, completed with music! anime characters, little bears, stars, pink hearts, cute little cursors, funny pop up script window, ready made navigation bars, tag board, and tiny weeny box for you to type ur posts in tiny weeny fonts... you name it!

ok... when i m totally bored with my template and bored with being a 24 yr old adult i would go there and get one... just for the fun of it.

2005-03-20T18:39:00.000+08:00

i used to think the pet shop at hol v is already closed and only pet food is left but realised yesterday that there are indeed animals inside. well there were a few cute doggies but nothing beats that cute little 4-months old ragdoll cat there... wow!!! so adorable and so good-natured. the owner of the shop took it in her arm facing up and rock it like a little baby. and it just stared curiously with its big blue eyes!!! you can hold it anyway! only thing not nice about that little kitten is its price-1200 sing dollars...

there was a cute munchkin too. short legs. supposedly more active and advanturous in nature. haha i've been doing research on cat breeds. used to really want a black and grey striped short hair cat, something like pixie-bob. but now i m thinking ragdoll is good! both are good!

a pixie-bob looks like this:

a ragdoll looks like this:

cute hor?

2005-03-18T19:26:00.000+08:00

things i find weird to do with a platonic guy friend who is not a gay, a gay straight guy, or at least super metrosexual.

1. cut hair (they should only see the end result and not the process)
2. facial (i scared myself when i happen to look into the mirror when i was doing mask in my room)
3. taking aerobics or dance lessons
4. shopping for lingerie (over my dead body)
5. shopping for clothes and come out of the fitting room to let him see how it fits
6. watching movies with long explicit scenes (a split of second is still fine)

some ppl may find it weird but well guys are guys and gals are gals. the above list is by no means exhaustive.

2005-03-18T15:16:00.000+08:00

now not only my dreams are colourful, there is smell as well. i dreamt that i was taking this bottle of perfume off a shelf and sprayed it into the air to test it. only if there is really such a perfume, i would totally buy it. it's a very sweet and yet refreshing smell, haha i think i had the mental image of flowers starting to blossom or sth. anyway the bottle looks a lot like 一生之水 (L 'Eau D'Issey i think) by 三宅一生 (Issey Miyake). but e bottle is red in colour instead of the original white and it's called 爱人之水. how much more imaginative can it get? i just had my own perfume in my dream!

2005-03-18T14:52:00.000+08:00

little birdies in tuxedo. so cute! they stopped somewhere outside my window grooming themselves.

2005-03-17T18:51:00.000+08:00

i was looking for this black spagetti strap top to wear this morning (or noon to be precise), but couldn't found it. nvm i thought coz it probably is in the laundry basket, which is already overflowing with clothes. did laundry this afternoon, and as i collected the clothes and folded them, i realised the particular piece of clothes i was looking for was not there. hmpf... combed through my entire wardrobe several times, nada... and went upstairs to search through the uncollected laundry, also nada, found plenty of socks and lacy panties there though. now is time for mental backtrack. i got a vague impression i wore it about two weeks ago. but totally no idea whether it is in this wash or the previous. gosh i hate it when sth is missing and i have to mentally backtrack when is the last time i saw it and where did i saw it and so on... my memory is failing me... soon i would have to start taking photos of myself everyday to remind me what did i wear each day and maybe keep a laundry journal... it's not my favourite or anything but it just bugs me as its mysterious disapperance is so peculiar... where could it be???

an afternoon of excursion

2005-03-17T15:52:00.000+08:00

had lunch with qinghui, weisheng, zhiwei and huiyi. had a little discussion of whether singaporean guys are shallow. haha well let's not go into that coz it would be long. quote BBB: ' yes i m shallow, just tell me which girl is pretty.'

after the rest of people went for their lessons, qh and i were two bored people in the slacking mood. since it was a super hot day, we decided to go in for some air conditioning when we walked past chinese library. first time in four years qh went inside there, second time for me i think. took a glance of the books they had there and qh was very amused by the titles of the all the 中国古代禁毁书籍-books banned in the past, of which a majority is considered too explicit to publish in the past. (青楼艳史 and alike) 'haha ancient chinese porno novels!'

as we came out, we saw this 3D wood carving of a part of 清明上河图 on the wall. there i started my cultural tutorial with qh, telling him that 清明上河图 is the longest painting in chinese history, the original is not 3D but a brush paiting blah blah... studied it in art lesson before when i was back in china.

so the topic gradually shifted to antiques, art collection and so on and we decided to go nus museum to have more exposure to cultural stuff, since heard from guofeng some time ago that they have new stuff there. (actually suggested by qh, hmm... an attempt to prove he's not shallow?) haha... nus museum... where the 牛角(脚) story came from...

they are having this persian caligraphy exhibition there now and there is those persian or arabic music playing in the exhibition area (think about one thousand and one night and belly dancing). what? persian caligraphy? you might ask... yes... some of them looks like frost on the cake to me... it's amazing! i m thinking, when european people first encountered the chinese language, they must be amazed by the structure it. one painting like pattern, is a word and can has its own meaning and pronounciation. if say that the basic units of chinese language is 横竖点撇 etc and the basic unit of latin language is the alphabets, a chinese word is made up by all these basic units in all kinds of arrangements and it's two dimensional. in say english language, the combination is only linear. tt's the difference we are getting here. two major types of languages in the world: 表音文字 vs 表意文字. (sorry dunno the english term). english belong to the former and chinese the latter. say if u know the rules of pronounciation, u see an english word, you can pronounce it but may not have a clue what it means. the opposite for chinese. ok i m not a linguistic and let's go no further. what amazed me about the persian caligraphy is that, whether english or chinese, you write it word by word, and in either horizontal or vertical directions. but the persian caligrahpy in the exhibition, it could be overlapping in one whole chunk, could be going in circles, could be by clusters... basically in all kinds of angles and directions and layout possible and we were just wondering, if someone is to read it, where does he even know where to start??? to me it feels like a 2D animal like ant discovering the 3rd dimension, totally beyond comprehension. hmm... reminds me of this short story i read about alien languages. it was saying the aliens, they don't have words and sentence, they represent one idea in one drawing and one glance they know what it means. very very intuitive. haha that could be too philosophical to touch on i guess...

another interesting thing in the exhibition is that they got like one caligraphy item up there and there is a corresponding song track you can play. no idea if what's written there is the lyrics or what. but it sounds quite nice indeed, very persian. hmm ancient civilization... language is merged with art and music... caligraphy and painting, and melody, could essentially be similar things.

also exhibited were persian artefacts. the carpets, the pen boxes, book covers, jewel box with drawers... wow!!! lacquered paper mache and wood with exuberant colours and exquisite paintings... so exotic and so zmazing!

2005-03-16T22:00:00.000+08:00

went to amore on my own. after i boarded the train, i realised there was this baby just in front of me sitting on his grandma's lap. basically he stared at me from buona vista to outram park, sucking his thumb, then index finger, then index finger and middle finger together, then the thum of another hand... finally more people boarded the train and his gaze started to wander, marked the end of his attention span. quite a cute baby, probably a few months old. but he got this sad and sulky expression in his eyes, even when he giggles (i was making faces at him) he looked sulky. haha but really very cute...

desiree must be very sad today, her lesson got only two people attending, the third one came in late and went off early. i never liked crowded studio but such a small class is quite stressful. haha she's so sad she shouldered two bars today, one pink and one yellow... when i can only manage a green. and today's routine is very very tiring... after the lesson, i had problem holding my hp to my ear with only one arm, needed another arm to support the holding phone arm.

OBSERVATIONS DURING DINNER

1. red ketchup and yellow mustard mixed thoroughly together gives a disgusting orange.
2. stawberry flavoured yogurt drink in yellow plastic cup is simply hideous.

2005-03-15T23:12:00.000+08:00

middle of March. one and half months left to the end of sufferings or the beginning of a different kinda suffering.

this sememster, has been damn depressing, especially recently. about? people... things... it's a state of mind with no clear explanation. maybe i m suffering from overdose of solitude resulted in increase in complexity of thoughts resulted in confusion and depression. ok. diagnosis done.

the thing is, i hardly see anyone around and can't remember when is the last time i really had proper conversation or good fun with my friends. well the last one i remembered was the 7-hrs talk with blur. a lot of people are starting to MIA, as for those still hanging around in school, give out a vibe that reads 'busy, don't disturb!'. i can smell anxiety in the air. lunch has become endless talk of job job job fyp... yes i m depressed. alone in my room staring at my 17-inch screen deciphering C++ code is depressing enough, but i guess, it could be worse...

four years of nus, is starting to feel like a battlefield for me. after so many things had happened, could we come out of here unscratched?

2005-03-13T22:20:00.000+08:00

there are two cubicles in the toilet near my room. during weekends, what usually happens is that within a short span of a few hours, half a roll of toilet paper (the big rolls u see in public toilet, not those small ones u use at home) in one cubicle deplets and the other cubicle has its toilet bowl choked up. i don't understand, the only reasonable explanation i have is people take toilet paper in one cubicle and throw it in the bowl of another to choke it... hmm too free during weekends so finding entertainment?

the toddler in 'a series of unfortunate event' is so cute!!!!!!!!!!

nus open house day

2005-03-12T17:10:00.000+08:00

nus is a big fun fair today. as i was walking back from lect, (zao lect 10min after it started coz was feeling incredibly bored and had no idea what he's talking about since i haven't watched last week's webcast) i realised the area near SRC is flooded with young kids from jc. young and bubbly and fresh and looking ignorant. guys with heads shaved. girls cling to their helium balloons in nus colours with nus logo printed. there was this girl in mini skirt had these words in big fonts written across her butt: love my mom... well... speechless... they flocked to nus in pairs or groups as if visiting a tourist attraction. there were even buses to shuffle them directly from JC-saw two comfort buses having a piece of paper at the front window with 'Hwa Chong' written on it. i found myself tracing back in memories of my HC days... the beige uniform that we always wanna tuck out (throw your shirt outside according to the principal), the class benches we have wonderful time hanging out at, great frenz, great teachers, the cute guys, the notorious guys, and the cute notorious guys... picking tambusu seeds at NIE for project and ran back in the heavy rain to the chilling air-conditioning in the container classroom, taking a ghost video on the attic of the green house, playing char-tay with a girl from another class and almost tore my skirt, bitching about the number 1 and number 2 handsome guys in school and basically everyone else who crossed our path... and the orientation in mud, the angel-mortal letters with Everclear, the collection of A-level results... yes, i did come for nus open house 4 years ago...

anyway, there were these three guys from nussu at the bus stop trying to convince people to join some weird eca probably CACS. 'we mainly do cultural activities like playing guitars, dancing, singing... but look at me, actually i can't dance or sing or do anything...' then for goodness's sake what are u doing in it? distributing flyers during open house? i guess so... but maybe they could at least get some decent looking guys to do it. i would be scared away thinking the eca contains only freaks if i was a freshie. anyway, they looked at me for a little while and decided to approach other people. i guess it's written all over my face 'go away! dun bother me!' but also they sensed i m a rusty old fart who would probably know better than them. well... nvm...

every year there was this time, the fresh blood flows into the old artery. i rem last year we were at IA and emileen came back to nus with her sister. some blind idiot approached her and asked her to join nussu camp. although we both agreed that the guy must be a really dumb ass, she's really quite happy someone actually thought she looks like a freshie. while i m still conveniently taking comfort in KK's remark a few weeks back about that i look younger than my actual age, someone else has also said that i look very mature. when i went back home last holiday, my working friend made a comment that the word 'student' is written all over me. i believe he used the term '老黄瓜刷绿漆-装嫩'. looks can be deceiving ah? if i don a mini skirt with 'love my mom' written on my buttock, could i possibly pass as a 20 yrs old? if i can, do i actually want to? nah... don't think so...

we grew older, and indeed wiser... although the increase in the 'wiser' aspect is not proportional to the 'older' aspect. but looking back at all the past years, all the stupid mistakes we made, the idiotic ignorant things we've done, and all the bad dressing sense, acne-infested complexion, weird looking hairstyle and tons of baby fat... do we actually want to go back there? that day weijie put the lyrics of an old song on his msn nick and it happens to be one of my favourites one decade ago. when i told him that, he said 'haha you also know this song? this says something about our age.' well... the doe-eyed fresh looking teenagers can be cute, but they are another generation altogether. so let them enjoy their sweet 19, and let me take pride in my sour 24.

someone's blue balloon rose up the sky and dissappeared...

2005-03-11T13:44:00.000+08:00

woke up at noon and went for a swim. took it nice and slow but still struggled to finish my 20 laps because of this ridiculous pain in my right calf since wednesday night. no idea what it is but it seems to be getting better with more sleep so just let it be. lucky me, it rains only after i came back.

yawnz... dreamt that i changed my bedsheet... tot it was real coz it felt very real, but now the old sheet is still on my bed which meant what i felt so real was only a dream... guess i was just figuring my bedsheet needs to be changed and too lazy to move so tried using my psychic/ mental power... well crap huh? haha... one more horrible dream is that all my pirated dvds were confisticated during a spot check during my eca practice... ohhh my precious collection...

2005-03-10T22:46:00.000+08:00

"i found that i missed the milk. it was my friendly decaying signpost every morning on the way to work. everything falls apart, everthing crumbles, everything rots. but everything looks really interesting in the meantime."-the world according to mimi smartypants

from happy legs...

2005-03-10T18:51:00.000+08:00

on sodium overload today. cooked this thing to go with noodle yesterday for lunch and there is a lot of left over. it tasted nice and i was craving for it by dinner time. lazy to cook noodle again so ate the dish alone. of course it is too salty. feeling bloated for the whole evening until today and legs felt as stiff as steel.well talking about legs.

two days ago my msn nick is 'happy legs', someone said sth today about i put the wrong nick and it's supposed to be *** (can't rem, some martial arts stuff that doesn't quite make sense to me, but probably implying i like kicking people). hmpf... if u dunno what 'happy legs' means, ask lah, don't make random assumption of it when it is totally not what you think it is. back to the point, happy legs is a biotherm product, not any stunts or moves u do to kick ppl k? it's a cooling gel to be applied on tired legs so the legs are happy. not that they will smile and laugh lah but it feels quite relaxing.

this thing just triggered me to think that a lot of times people like to use their wild imagintation or limited knowledge to make assumptions of things they do not know for sure. for example someone assuming someone else knows something when that person actually doesn't, or assuming someone is going somewhere, going to do something when it is not the case. sometimes it's harmless, sometimes can cause misunderstanding and sometimes simply more on the annoying side. guofeng wrote in his blog that 'what we take to be the truth may actually be part facts part imagination or expectation. And it is due to these imagination/expectations of ourselves that we dont really see things the way that they are and affecting our actions that are to follow.' although i think Hitch is just a laugh-and-forget-it movie and doesn't take such deep meanings (credit to his philosophical mind), but i do agree on his point. just how many of us can keep such a thinking in daily life?

i hope i m not offending anyone. this is honestly the third time i m changing this entry. i m thinking, how effective is communication based on pure language? when different people read sth they might take on different tones and have vastly different reaction, it happens often as you don't hear or see the person writing it. worse still, we are normal folks, not professional writers or diplomats. how effective are we expressing ourselves using say written language? how much control do we have over things we say? language can be so feeble sometimes. when something is written or said, it is not given away, on contrast, something is added to the burden of the person. because there is worry about the consequences of the words, worry about saying wrong things, worry about miscommunication... hmm... would a telepathy kinda of connection be better?

comment on the flowers i put in the background leh. pretty right? hee

顾城的诗

2005-03-09T00:25:00.000+08:00

在湿淋淋的阳光中
没有尘土
贝壳们继续眯着眼睛

春天，春天已经来了
很近
在别人不注意的时候
换上了淡紫色的长裙

是的，他醒了
醒在一个明亮的梦里
凝望着梳洗完毕的天空
他在长大
按照自己的愿望年轻的生长着
他的腿那么细长
微微错开
在远处，摇晃着这片土地

2005-03-08T22:34:00.000+08:00

ok i m officially irritated! there has been this noise of a heavy motorbike racing up and down somewhere near my hall ever since i came back, which means for at least 20min or so. (i also considered the possibility that it's some machine in engin but decided that would be too far to hear.) it's really loud and irritating and i got absolutely no idea why this person wants to waste his fuel in this kinda meaningless activities. or maybe there is a group of them i dunno. but for goodness sake this is NUS! however we hate this place this is still an university which is supposedly ranked in top 20 in the world and now some brainless gansters are racing their bikes here... now in a real 'racing' manner as in really go race down the road but up and down up and down basically going in circles. i m crossing my fingers and pray that their/his bike(s) break down real soon from all these abuses.

anyway... went amore this evening for my first ever step workout class. saw fire engins on the way, 5 of them, with full alarm, right behind cineleisure. dunno where the fire is but the hazy air is surely a killer. was 10min late for the lesson and had a bad start. all those stepping up and down turn around is really making me dizzy and confused. din really have much of a workout... it's hardly intensive, just confusing... luckily i m not too slow a learner, after half an hour of twisting my legs together from making wrong moves and almost tripped on the step board once, finally or hopefully managed to master most of the basic steps... haiz sounds how pathetic but nvm.

wherever the fire is, the entire singapore is surely hazy... like what my mother says, singapore must be so small that someone farts in the east and others can smell it in the west.

2005-03-08T13:08:00.000+08:00

the blogger xiaxue is in nus today, and i actually dragged qinghui and weisheng to go have a look at her at forum. although had some mental preparation, still her real person kinda had a disillusioning effect on me. no no, i certainly am straight and has absolutely no interests in plump heavily made up ah lians. it's just her blog is funny and nice and this gal really got some things going on in her mind. i would like her to look slightly more sophisticated. qinghui said she looks nothing but a slut. and weisheng thinks he's seen her somewhere before. well tt's BBB speaking. and what can i say? they all look the same with their long permed hair, layers of powers, black smoky eyes and lips that are too red. for example i think xiaxue looks like a twin of the mechanical engin gal who stays across my corridor, with the only difference in height. somehow got a feeling they've become one species of ppl. on top of the original rebonded species, now we have two! wow! how wide a variety!!! certainly we don't have to worry about mutation. mistaking someone for someone else might be a problem, but well who really knows who?

http://xiaxue.blogspot.com/

2005-03-07T23:49:00.000+08:00

had my first long day in school this semester-10am to 5pm with 2 and half hours of slacking in between (i know some people would wanna kill me for this). by the time i was leaving lab, eyes were closing on their own will and felt so lethargic i would really just drop dead in my bed. 3 modules + fyp which is supposed to be finishing, and no other activities, i can't quite call myself busy this semester. truth is, i've been sleeping either my mornings or afternoons away. if i can't graduate with a satisfying grade, i know who to blame. but seriously, is there really so much work to do that ppl are practically camping in school since the first half of the sem? wow... scares me definitely. nvm, was just thinking that i would be having such long days every single day when i start work. that sends a shiver down my spine. and no holidays to take when i get all cranky... sigh...

2005-03-06T12:48:00.000+08:00

had a long string of dreams with the buggies, half a class of my primary school class and some of my uni friends inside. there is a swan mother who keeps her babies warm by tucking them under her tummy, and a seagull helper who helps her collect swan feathers when she is away. and there is a cute furry cat who is so nice to hug. apparently we were squatting beside a stream catching something and there is a huge snake wriggled its way through and one friend of mine(i can't remember who, a girl though) caught it by its head happily and showed to all of us. then there was this camp in my junior high in beijing but the ppl who attended are my primary sch frenz. and i was so late for the morning assembly i had to cross the field in front of the entire school. after which there was this test thingee going on and the buggies and i came out of the hall and realised it had rained heavily but stopped. the sky line far far away is such a deep blue you can never see it in real life. above it is a ligher shade, more like the real life sky blue. and the white clouds piled in the sky like castle. on the right there is a hill full of trees, and water from the rain is racing down in a fashion of a flood. the steam above the huge stream of river formed a mist that looks a lot like clouds too. the air is so cool and refreshing. felt so good! we walked along and found this chinese styled garden with lots of pavilions and towers inside. blur and i were reading the carvings and realised we dun understand it although it's chinese. then qinghui messaged me saying this irritating guy is asking him to go shopping but he doesn't want to go, asking me how. i was about to reply him when i woke up.

woke up with weird pain in my jaw line near the chin, both sides. what kinda activities would result in injuries at that area? have i been talking too much, opened my mouth too much? hmm...

2005-03-05T23:01:00.000+08:00

the movie Hitch is about dating. apparently there are rules that must be observed and men could never get it right. it's a battlefield out there full of land mines. one step wrong, you go boom. the first date, first kiss... must make sure everything is right. sounds calculated, but isn't it true that first impression counts? even if you've known that person for a while, say as a normal friend or a colleague but when the two of you go out on a date, haha, totally another story.

recently, after long hours of programming, i've been watching reruns of sex and the city. was talking to blur that stories like in these shows would never happen on us or around us because the culture is just so different. in say america, people meet people and date randomly. a few dates later, then they decide whether they would want to see each other exclusively. watching SATC, i can't help thinking how many men are these four women dating... how is it possible they have not exhausted all the single males in new york city, and yet, in 10yrs, Carrie only had 5 relationship with only one of them serious. put Hitch in Singapore, i wonder if he would be out of job. not saying which is good which is bad. but as blur complained she has no life, i was just thinking maybe us asians don't date enough. haha or maybe it's just us.

relationship is a complicated thing, because human beings are complicated thing, or at least the female ones. it's not as easy as what carrie wanted-a guy who is sure she is the one, because when that one guy comes along, she might not want him. it's also not as easy as what samantha wanted-no fuss hot one night stands with no strings attached, because we are emotional animals who do not want to go home alone to an empty house. not the charlotte way either-a perfect house with perfect interior decoration, perfect furniture, perfect china, not mentioning the perfect man, coz nothing in this world is perfect and it's the flaws that make them beautiful. maranda? she's too smart, men are scared away, but tt's not her fault. people say that being needy is a nature of women, but how true is that? sometimes guys can be more needy than us. there are so many self-help books out there but has any one of it had every individual guy and gal figured all out? we barely understand ourselves.

well enough crap for the day.

2005-03-04T17:32:00.000+08:00

haiz... stuck at fyp again... dun see any logic error in my code but it just keeps hanging after running for a while because of some memory problem...

running and go hand itself...

shanshan's blog

2005-03-04T01:26:00.000+08:00

http://spaces.msn.com/members/blurcamel/

hehe she asked to help her advertise. i like the interface, very pretty. keep up the good work blur! heehee!

sigh... time for self-reflection for alot of us it seems... today a friend asked me how come such a little person (in size) as me got so much thoughts to organise. i dunno, i've been like that since i remembered things. i keep trying to organise my feelings and thoughts but they get constantly messed up... similar situation of my room... keep packing and keep messing it up... no wonder ppl say how come u are always packing ur room but there doesn't seem to be a difference.

quarter life and mid sem crisis

2005-03-03T14:32:00.000+08:00

a lot of things are happening around me recently. myself, friends... i guess everyone has their problems. this week is a week of tests and quizzes, some people starting writing thesis already and other people like me still stuck with fyp itself. friends around me are sending out resume, applying ofr jobs, going for interviews... luckily or unluckily, i m spared with this. it's already March, soon the final semester of our uni life will be over. still confused about academic work, still confused about life in general... as we all stumble along the way, anxious to find out the relationship between self and the world, we wish life could be a code made up of 'if-else', better still a switch statement, that could be run as many times as we want. but the programme runs only once and hang. too many choices might not be such a good thing sometimes, it leaves us standing at the crossroad and wonder, wasting all our time in choosing, and regretting.

having flashing back of memories, fond one and not... rainy afternoon...

2005-03-01T13:42:00.000+08:00

it's been three days of the absense of the cleaning aunty. wondering what had happened to her. apparently the management never bother to send in any replacement so my floor is practically in a mess now. the floor is littered with horribly numerous strands of hair (typical of a girls' floor). the toilet nearest to my room has run out of toilet paper for two days in a row and the one further away has all its toilet bowls choked. all the hostelites are so used to the convenience of living with public facilities that are taken care of and what everyone does is just to wipe her own ass, not caring that her left over food is choking the wash basin, because, by tml it would all be cleaned up by someone. now the someone is not there and things start to get really messy. sigh...

some links are updated. those interested can go and browse around.

2005-02-25T03:26:00.000+08:00

howl

2005-02-25T03:25:00.000+08:00

poster

ハウルの動く城 / Hauru no Ugoku Shiro

2005-02-25T02:51:00.000+08:00

been going out a lot recently...

thanks guys for the wonderful birthday celebration u all threw for me. hehe the crabs were really good. hmm come to think of it i've never eaten crabs this big (well, i dun eat crabs v often tt's a fact). juz too bad din see the dry ice in the chocolate. think it all disappeared when i reach hall.

watched howl's moving castle today, another anime by studio ghibli, directed by miyazaki my favourite anime producer!!! his anime are just sooooo fine and fasinating, with a touch of humanity and a hint of magic. the themes are never too childish coz miyazaki produces anime for not only children but ppl of all age. watching howl's moving castle, is like taking a ride on the merry-go-round, looking down at the changing landscape of the world. no wonder the theme song is a waltz tune called 'merry-go-round of life'. howl (or hauru in jap) is simply so handsome, haha they made a good choice to get Takuya Kimura to do the voice coz he's the most suitable for the character, both in looks and charisma. (drooling all over.) and there is this stupid dog yean who has legs too short and could never get up any steps and ends up running in circle in sheer frustration, the talking fire calcifier, the witch of waste who ogles and drools at anything beautiful (esp cute guys). last but not least the heroine (all of miyazaki's shows have a brave heroine who is not necessarily pretty but has a lot of characters).

have faith, and all spells will be broken.

2005-02-23T13:37:00.000+08:00

forgot to switch off my hp last night and reluctantly woke up to the beeping of incoming messages at 8+, 9+, 10+ and 12+ respectively. had so many dreams... my flying broom is not working and etc...

the realisation of the fact that i m already 24 yrs old is sinking in. two days ago there was this stranger added me on msn. since there has rarely been the cases where strangers trying to talk to me, i added him/her and asked who he/she is. turned out he/she doesn't know who i am and started asking my name blah blah. when i didn't reply he/she said 'i m 12. how old are u?' that was the moment i decided there is absolutely no chance i know this person so i blocked him/her and deleted the contact. gosh i m twice as old as this kid! (still wondering how on earth did he/she get my email address though.)

been shopping for working wear lately, checking out blouses, proper pants and work jackets. whenever i look at cuter clothes such as pink cotton tube top with lacy flower brooch some ppl keep telling me that it's not my age. well, time to revamp my image?

2005-02-23T02:40:00.000+08:00

my birthday cake

surprise!

2005-02-23T02:29:00.000+08:00

thank you buggies!!! i was really surprised or rather shocked to see u all appear at my door at midnight with a cake with lighted candles. haha... for quite a few yr nv heard the happy birthday song already.

had quite a chaotic situation, with all the msn messages coming in, hp beeping and room phone ringing and three ppl in my room waiting for me to cut the cake...

thanks everyone for remembering my birthday and all the greetings! thank you qinghui(though i ended up calling u at midnight to tell u about booking acs lab2), ivan, small ray, bingjie, weijie, hxy(dun think he's reading this blog though) for the greetings. thanks weifa for flooding the msn window with all the emoticons. thanks big ray and kay leong for putting greeting message as ur msn nick. haha and thanks lerming for all those rubbish u talked in order to occupy my time while the bugs sneaked up my block. (now do i sound like i m giving a post award-winning speech?)

anyway... dun buy cakes from breadtalk, esp tiramisu.

and lazy, hope ur haze-induced mental block cures soon.

2005-02-22T13:35:00.000+08:00

really like this part of the year, when it's always sunny outside but the sunlight doesn't shine into my room the entire day. cool wind blows...

2005-02-21T15:58:00.000+08:00

singtel is having big problems today. i could never ever send out any sms. the network gives me only limited service. and even their hotline got congestion. no wonder singtel engineers are not well paid... or issit BECAUSE they are not well paid?

a dream of red

2005-02-21T13:39:00.000+08:00

my dream was red. it looked like blood, but at a closer look, maple leaves that were scattered on the ground. there was a tree, maple tree. the leaves were red like burning fire. the sky was painted a orangy red colour, as if it was lighted by the flame of a strong fire.

i wish i could take a picture of that, language is so pale and feeble sometimes.

yet, isn't it interesting that from the same description, no individula paints a mental picture as another? the pale and feeble language leaves us so much room for imagination...

2005-02-21T03:07:00.000+08:00

one more thing about nose operations. i have a friend how has his nose operated on before and word is two rubber tubings will be stuck up ur nose all time for the entire duration. can't remember if he mentioned that the tubings were there before and after the operation as well. let's hope not.

hmm absurd that i m writing this at 3am in the morning huh? had a nice sleep till noon. it's weekend and the weird guys in raffles hall lion dance team finally stopped their morning practices and let me sleep in peace. these few days they've been hitting the drums and whatever instruments u call those at 8am in the morning. no idea if they really do the dances coz i dun bother to stick my head out and look. and seems like they got a truck and goes around making noise. a new kinda morning call?

anyway had quite a few interesting thoughts today. maybe will take time to organise them and write it down some other day. hopefully i won't forget about it. anyway i m reading this book called 'the world according to mimi smartypants' by well mimi smartypants! haha... it's actually her blog which was made into a book. this lady here is hilarious. funny to no end. but u know, i m hoping that i dun turn out to be as crazy as her reading too much of that. although i m sometimes crazy enough. like now?

did i mention to anyone that i ate only one meal today and it was stir fried potato?

2005-02-20T20:22:00.000+08:00

my fairy name is diamond whistling nightingale. haha

http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/toys/namegen/291/

was bored and reading other ppl's blog by clicking on e 'next blog' button on my page. and began to wonder what is the percentage of english users writing blogs, and what is the percentage of singaporeans writing blog.

assume that the search is totally randome. sometimes as i browse, very often that i come across some blogs written by singapore teenage girls (very distinct, with all the pinky and starry decoration on the page and small small fonts squeezed inside on little pathetic box). this time though, what's been popping up are mostly non-english blogs.

normally, one glance i could tell whether it is or it is not english. and apparently there was this blog that i decided it's malay or some exotic weird european languages with the first look and only after i already navigated away did i realise that it MIGHT actually be english. and guessed wat? another singaporean teenage girl's page, with all that teenage way of writing coded english that would confuse a junior college GP teacher. http://jiahui16.blogspot.com/

maths

2005-02-20T19:02:00.000+08:00

term break again. it marks that 1/2 of the semester is gone.
blur's msn nick is 'quater life crisis'. well, 1/4 of our lives is gone. (well though i'd be very happy if now is exactly 1/4 of my life, coz that means i can live 96yrs.)
2months, half a semester of our student lives left, 3/4 of our lives to live, finishing 145 modular credits to graduate, looking for the 1st job, and wondering for the nth time, what i want in life...

24yrs...

2005-02-20T18:13:00.000+08:00

called qh to ask about advanced control lab report and no one answered the phone. when he finally called back after quite a while, it seems that he was lying somewhere sun tanning on a basketball court with a bleeding nose that was elbowed right on by eric. from what he has described, he has shed blood all over the basketball court, i assume not in a very heroic way. these guys think they are still tough teenagers who bleed like sweat.

when i was 13, studying in my parents' school, first grade, i always looked upon the students in my mother's calss as cool and sophisticated senior students, who are 5yrs older than me. there was this once that this guy in her class got into trouble with some other guy from another class because of a girl, some innocent stuff of borrowing homework or those sort of things and they broke into a fight. another guy in my mother's class wanted to make peace and was punched directly on the face. one punch and his nose bone broke. had to insert some steel thingee inside there. and his classmates went mad and wild, swearing to take revenge and waiting at the school gate with bricks in hand and all those things... haha heroic act coz the punching guy was one notourious member of one gang or dunno wat... remember that i was running around after my mother that time when she was all over the school looking for her students, talking to them and trying to settle the matter. first time i heard about such things and a broken nose. that was truly exciting for me at that time. and how cool it was i thought, just like tv dramas. kinda wished that when i grew up to 17, 18yrs old sth lidat would happen in my own life as well, that some poor classmate of mine would break someone's nose or had his nose broken... but well... never happened... not everyone's life can be exciting in that sense i guess...

2005-02-20T00:03:00.000+08:00

pretty handbag with butterfly clip. =)

2005-02-19T23:25:00.000+08:00

ok just saw on news that the there was fire the area of 10 football fields at tampines today. the 390th fire this year. sorry indonesians.

my eyes and respiratory system are feeling so uncomfortable now... really hope there is a way i can wash them off...

hazy hot stuffy day

2005-02-19T21:55:00.000+08:00

indonesia must be burning again. the air in singapore smells like half the population are smoking at the same time. another boring day of law in school. hmm lawyers like to be late ah? i wonder why they charge by hour then.

went out walk walk, bought some things i really like, yeah! saw my jc senior (who is actually same age as me). hmm turned very demure leh. nicely dressed and v chio. working class really different. well ya ya qh she looks younger than me, so wat???

greedy u rem daniel from 00S21? his mother is a MP right? i think she's featured in this month's herworld. coz saw daniel's photo in there. he looked very young back in 1997 hahahaha... well he probably is still very young now.

cyclopus

2005-02-18T21:33:00.000+08:00

cyclops is an one eye monster in greek mythology. today i almost became sth lidat thanks to weifa's accurate aiming and wonderful smash. right there on my right eye, pain ah...

cooking is a lifestyle

2005-02-17T21:00:00.000+08:00

recently have been in a cooking mood. yesterday was steamed tofu with minced meat, today is 烧茄子+蒜蓉空心菜. cooking is a good way to relax actually, and very satisfying cooking sth nice... hmm but can only do it occasionally, will go mad if i have to cook everyday.

disastrous afternoon

2005-02-15T14:59:00.000+08:00

what a hot day... i came back happily with a 1.5L bottle of chilled sprite ice from the yih shop. without any accident, reached my room safely. as i put it on my table and turned the cap, a fountain of sprite shot out in all directions. i was so shocked i could only stare at it. didn't even shook it on the way lor!!! and then my desk and my floor both flooded with sweet sticky sprite... best...

had a hard time cleaning... just washed, wiped and blew dry my computer keyboard... hair dryer is a clumsy gal's best friend...

v day

2005-02-14T21:36:00.000+08:00

movie date with lazy and blur. watched at jurong point coz wanted to avoid the crowd. seoul raiders. hmm... the only thing nice about the show is tony leung. was looking for dinner place afterwards and even KFC was fully packed. all the better restaurants got super duper long queue. the one outside swesen's queued all the way from 2nd floor to ground floor. ended up going back to clementi and ate at pizza hut there. v day ah v day... everywhere is so crowded...

dinner at lerming's

2005-02-14T02:01:00.000+08:00

thanks a lot lerming for the dinner! but the soccer was boring... anyway i think lazy had a pretty good time watching the fish... haha...

happy valentine's day everybody!

orchard on saturday

2005-02-12T21:02:00.000+08:00

went KB at cineleisure. Ray's lesson is ever so tiring... went walk walk at orchard after the lesson. saw this 5-yrs old kid playing drums outside heeren. there is a board in front saying he's the youngest drummer in singapore. quite cute leh the kid, wearing a luminous blue sun glasses... and he's really not bad, at least for his age. a lot of ppl were watching and taking photos. the one thing i dun quite like is there is a can there for coins collection. although there is nothing wrong to earn some bucks showing off his talent but i think this kinda thing really is not suitable for a 5-yrs old kid.

almost forgot today is saturday, sigh have lesson on saturday really spoils the mood. was wondering how come there are so many ppl in orchard. haha...

now there is sth fun. had a visit to the lingerie department at Tangs after its renovation. there is only one word... "wow!" not only the display and collection, the fitting room is like on of a kind in singapore i guess. haha i know that most of the ppl reading my blog would never have a chance to see how it's like inside there so here i offer a description (too bad didn't bring camera). it's a circular setting and in the middle is this super big round cushion with a mannequine lying on top wearing skimpy night gown, with her legs bent and open. (quite weird. actually was a bit shocked to see it.) and a few staff (mostly aunties) sitting around it folding lingeries... even more weird looking now... surrounding the centre cushion are the fitting rooms. the doors are those chinese antique type, dark coloured wood with golden handles. (got a picture?) inside is almost about the size of my hostel room!!! (sob sob... see... tt's how nus students are treated.) one of the walls in the room is entirely a big mirror, at the other end is a round zebra-printed cushion with diameter of about 1.5m. at the back is a wall made up by numerous diamond shaped small mirrors. can see so many of your reflections inside. if i din rem wrongly there is also draped maroon velvet curtains. haha... really makes the customers feel like stars in the VIP room of some nightclubs. interesting hor?

on my way back saw a jap cute guy and a greek cute guy (my guess, coz he has some weird accent and is wearing a GREECE shirt) on the train. really looks like statue leh the features... haha...

so tired now...

dream

2005-02-11T18:25:00.000+08:00

played badminton this morning. came back after lunch and took a long nap. had this dream, which is not good, neither was it bad. it's just a simple dream in which i m all alone in my hostel room, with my hp spoilt, internet connection gone. i know that lazy and blur are somewhere but i m just not able to get them, not able to talk to them... it's the kinda dream that leaves me feeling alone, and lost... sometimes, security is simply having ppl around u...

2005-02-11T01:14:00.000+08:00

me and blur

2005-02-11T01:13:00.000+08:00

me and lazy